I’ve been crying around, under, on and over you

 

Truth:

There is nothing worse than half-dried clothes, except maybe finals week senior year.

The mixture of leaving forever/ packing everything you own /applying for jobs and internships creates a mess of emotions that my body can only process through crying.

After some immersion journalism I’ve discovered that there are three basic types of crying :

Happy – I am graduating! (Or, in my case, going to Lacoste, France in the fall and then graduating!) I am going home to see my family and becoming a mystical adult.

Sad – I am leaving everyone! It was all over too soon! Just when I was getting to know you, we’ll probably never see each other again, etc.

And the most popular: PANICKED – I am not going to get a job. I am going to fail all my classes.  I am not actually graduating.  How am I going to get rid of all this stuff? Why do I own all this shit? (SOMEONE PLEASE BUY MY FILE CABINET.) I’m not ready to graduate, I don’t even know how to do my hair. I don’t actually want to be a (insert thing you studied) I’ve wasted the last four years of my life.

Seen through ultraviolet panic-detecting light.

Of course there is also the crying paradox where you continue to cry because you feel silly about crying in the first place. This can turn happy tears into sad ones, panicked into happy and sad into panicked.

I predict the crying will continue until June 2.

In the mean time I am a very ugly crier so if you see me blotchy-faced with big swollen eyes know that I have not been jumped by a pack of angry fashion students, just crying because I am happy to go back west, confused, excited and sad that it’s all over.

My body is just reacting the only way it knows how.  
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